Words matter

The way we speak about ourselves but also about our body and our health matters.

Not only do words matter, but they can also hurt. Neuroscientist Maria Richter and her team discovered that negative words release stress and anxiety-inducing hormones in subjects. The words we use when talking about ourselves do matter.

Talking about our health

If the words we use when talking about ourselves matter, what about the words we use to describe about our physical and mental health? Does it matter if we often say ‘I keep forgetting things’, “My brain doesn’t work properly’, ‘I’m not strong enough.’ Personally I think it makes a difference because it influence how we see ourselves. The difference might seem minimal - for example ‘I cannot do this’ vs ‘I cannot do this yet’- but the impact is real.

This explains the power of mantras. Years ago, at the end of a yoga class, during relaxation, the teacher invited us to repeat this mantra ‘Every day in every way, I’m getting better and better’. I loved the rhythm of this sentence and kept repeating it to myself all the time, while walking to the bus stop, while waiting for the bus… I must have repeated this mantra millions of times. I’m sure it made a difference to the way I felt about being diagnosed with MS.

I also ‘named’ the MS symptoms I experienced. I know it sounds a bit crazy, but it felt better, less scary.

About George

It all started one night when I was sitting in front of my computer, working away on my doctoral thesis. I started to feel a slight discomfort. It got worse and worse. Then suddenly, I felt an electrical shock down my spine and into my legs. I recognised it as the famous Lhermitte syndrome. I had it before. But this time, I also felt a pressure around my ribcage. It felt as if the muscles between my ribs were tightening. It was hard to breathe in. My mind went crazy with an internal dialogue along these lines:

- “Is it a heart attack? There’s nobody in the house. Maybe I should ring someone.”

- “Don’t be ridiculous. Your heart is fine, slightly broken but ok. You’ll be fine.”

- “Seriously, It’s getting really sore now.”

-“Why don’t you lie down and relax. Have a break. You’ll get back to it later.”

I lay down and tried to relax. But I couldn’t. If you’ve had the MS Hug before, you’ll know what I mean. It feels like your ribcage is being crushed. I decided to imagine that a good-looking man was hugging me… George Clooney was the first to come to my mind. He would do. I imagined his big hands around my waist, holding me tight.

This actually made me laugh. Eventually the pain subsided. Whether George’s embrace or the laughing made a difference or not doesn’t matter. What matters is that it made it easier for to cope with the fear.

Talking with friends

I told this episode to a friend, also living with MS. She thought that was actually nice. A few weeks later, she texted me ‘George came to visit me too!’ I then decided to name all my symptoms - since I don’t have many symptoms nowadays, I have a list of names awaiting their symptoms. Not in a hurry though…

After this episode, I gave my MS symptoms a new name and used it with my friends and flatmates - explaining them how it felt and what I would call it. In a way, it made the whole communication easier. I felt that my friends wanted to know how I felt but not necessarily to hear words like ‘optic neuritis’, ‘dysesthesias’, ‘trigeminal neuralgia’ or ‘L’Hermitte’s syndrome’. It was scary for them too! So instead, they would ask ‘Is Arthur annoying you’? Or I’d say ‘Ben wont stop’.

I remember telling my neurologist about this. He was first surprised but recognised it wasn’t a bad idea if it helped.

What about you? How do you talk about your health? Do you think it matters?

Wishing you a wonderful day.

See you on the mat.

With love,

Véronique